Drive to Work
On my way to work this morning I was thinking a bit more about Tripp than I normally do. I think about him every morning, but I don't let my mind go back to those 5 days. Today I was letting my mind slip for brief, little moments. It was long enough to have the heavy sinking feeling creep into my being. I was about 10 blocks from my school when "If I Die Young" by the Band Perry came on. Lately, I haven't been letting myself listen to that song. It is just too sad. This morning I had let sadness in and I wanted to hear that song. I knew that if I listened, I couldn't drive, so I immediately pulled over onto a residential street, put the van in park, rested my head on the steering wheel and cried. I closed my eyes, listened to the words and let the tears stream down my face. About two thirds of the way through the song there was a knock on my window. I looked up and a man, dressed for work, asked, "are you alright?" I sat up, waved my hands and blubbered, "I'm okay, I'm okay." Over the man's shoulder I saw his wife and child standing on the front steps of their home. I looked right at his wife. She had her hands held to her face. She looked concerned. In that moment, I wondered if I should roll down my window and say, "my son died," but then what? An even more awkward moment when the kind man was lost for words? Once again, I didn't know what to say or how to say it. I know that man doesn't read my blog, but for what its worth, I would like to thank him for showing me kindness in my dark moment.