May 22

I have had a really rough morning.  I have been doing lots of thinking about the multitude of emotions I am feeling and I don't feel like thinking about it anymore.  Somehow, I hope, that if I stop thinking about it, I will stop feeling it.  Thus, I am not going to write about it.

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Last night we went into Calder's room to tuck him in before we went to bed and this is what we found:

Calder had taken all 6 of his "babies" (aka: stuffed animals), three blankets, and mattress cover and tossed them outside his crib.  He had also pulled the pillowcase off of his pillow and that's what he's cuddling.  Apparently, he had a wild party before falling asleep last night.

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This morning, I decided to start a weekend tradition.  It will be called Rainbow Pancakes.  I made the pancakes (with some helpful assistance from Calder) and he picked the colors.

Calder likes to eat his pancakes with peanut butter, just like his dad.  The enormous amount of syrup is courtesy of Great Grandma Fritshaw.  To quote her, "you can never have too much syrup."

Calder ate one green and half a blue!