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I'm Not Going To Fight With You

This morning Calder came to my side of the bed when he woke up. This isn't rare, but it isn't the norm either. He wiggled up with Ella, his stuffed elephant. She is soft and worn from all the hugs, snuggles and baths in the washing machine. Calder pulled his blankey over top of us. This is even softer and even more worn. It was mine when I was a baby. My mom used to laugh at me for moving it from house to house through university. No, I didn' t sleep with it. Just couldn't part with it! Lugging it around and secretly wondering if I had attachment issues has paid off when I see Calder dragging it down our hallway.

I enjoyed my morning snuggles and slowly made my way to the shower. As I headed to the bathroom, Calder says, "Mommy, I'm not going to fight with you today." Alleluia 

To Calder's credit, he had a great morning. We only have about 45 minutes with him before we take him to daycare and during that time he cooperated, smiled and laughed.

Fast forward to after work. Calder ran into his bedroom as soon as we pulled in the door to put his pajamas on. He would wear pj's 24 hours a day if we permitted it! He played cars, made a race track, and pushed his Buzz Lightyear car around at high speeds (so high in fact that the night before Buzz went into time-out for crashing into the wall 3 times).

I headed into his room to help him get back into some clothes, because we had a birthday party to go to. As I entered Calder's toy-filled waste land he shouted, "Get out of my room!"

"I don't think so, Calder. You can not tell me what to do."

"You aren't allowed in here."

"I am allowed wherever I want. This is mine and Daddy's house."

"This is my room"

"Actually this is my room Calder, I just let you live in it."

"No it's my room. You aren't allowed."

Realizing this conversation was headed no where fast, I quickly asked him if he could get dressed in 20 seconds. Calder will do anything to win a race.

Fast forward to bedtime. I go to kiss Calder good night and he looks at me and says, "I don't like you."


I explained it wasn't very nice to say things like that he and proceeded to throw every single one of his stuffed animals toward me.

I headed to the door, shut off the light, and went to my early morning happy place :-)

Have a great weekend!


  1. :( This must be incredibly tough some days. As least you are able to focus on the good moments. My sister has a relationship with her son similar to this (he is now 8) and there have been some trying times, but there are a lot of good moments too:) In the end, he loves her to bits, he just has a hard time realizing how hurtful he can be some times:( Some day he will...and some day Calder will also.

  2. It is hard, but Calder and I do have LOTS of fun together, so when I am rested and in the right mind, it is easy to drift back to those fabulous times.

    I remember as a teenager reading my baby book. When I was about Calder's age I told my mom that I wished she would go away and that it was just me and dad. When I read that as a teenager, I was mortified. I couldn't believe I had been so mean! But it was also interesting. I knew I was a daddy's girl as a teenager, I just didn' t realize it started so early!

    This has brought me to a place where I am completely fine with Calder being a daddy's boy. I just now look foward to the time when he is mortified that he acted so mean!

  3. Hey Jordan - Brennan goes through the same thing with Will, too. It's hard to watch, but we just keep letting Will know that it's not okay to talk to Daddy like that, and that it hurts Daddy's and Mommy's feelings when he says or does mean stuff like that.

    Hang in there!!! It sounds like you're keeping it all in perspective, though.


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